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(no subject)
Noah has been an outcast his entire life. It's hard to say which is worse. Is it being an outcast because you are a sickly, dying thing and people either make fun of you or pity you? Is it being an outcast because you are mostly demon and have done so many terrible things you can never hope to make up for them? It's likely the second that is worse. He's gotten in more than a few fights since he returned to Valhalla. It's mostly been defending himself. He has a temper, but his sense of guilt towards the people in this city... it's astronomical.
As an outcast, he takes his food on a plate, and he sits outside on the steps leading up to the main hall, away from the rest of the people inside who celebrate, who congratulate each other. It's easier this way. No one wants to sit at a table with him, and it's not as though he can blame them. At least as a kid, he just sat at a corner... sometimes with his father, sometimes not. His father is now dead too. He was no warrior, but it was likely the loss of his wife and his... son which did him in. It's quite a lot for a man with such a big heart as his father had to come to grips with.
It's been over a year now since he's been back.
It's another regret. It's another sin to add to the rest.
He takes a goblet full of mead, drinking that back. It clangs awkwardly on the step.
As an outcast, he takes his food on a plate, and he sits outside on the steps leading up to the main hall, away from the rest of the people inside who celebrate, who congratulate each other. It's easier this way. No one wants to sit at a table with him, and it's not as though he can blame them. At least as a kid, he just sat at a corner... sometimes with his father, sometimes not. His father is now dead too. He was no warrior, but it was likely the loss of his wife and his... son which did him in. It's quite a lot for a man with such a big heart as his father had to come to grips with.
It's been over a year now since he's been back.
It's another regret. It's another sin to add to the rest.
He takes a goblet full of mead, drinking that back. It clangs awkwardly on the step.
no subject
"Well it's much better than being normal. Now who'd want that?"
Shifting a little, she moves her arm and hooks hers around his own, linking them together. Whether he's much for closeness or not, she doesn't seem overly concerned. She's decided; this is what they do now.
"So go on then. I've told you mine. You tell me yours. What's with the eyes then? What's all that about?"
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They're quite clearly not most people which is probably why they never fit in. It took them both down terrible paths in the end, but he doesn't know that he can regret it. He is no longer sick. He is no longer feeling that very same weakness he had felt growing up, all his life.
The hooking her arm with his own makes him pause, glancing down at their arms like that and then back up at her face. There's something quizzical there in his expression. Closeness isn't something he has had with anyone in... a very long time, not one that comes from a genuine place. The question has him pausing too though the answer finally comes. Everyone else knows as it is. It's no big secret.
"The terrible Agent I made a deal with was Attar, and it made me a demon."
One of Attar's demons, tied to him.
no subject
"He's not very nice. And he's sneaky. I don't like sneaky."
It's much more than simply that of course, and his admission paints a much more vivid picture than the one she's commenting on. It's almost like she might have an air of tact. Don't go telling people, she has a reputation to uphold after all.
"Well it'd be silly for me to tell you that was a bad idea because I'm sure you know that already don't you." A statement more than a question. She can see from the heaviness in his eyes that it weighs upon him, and that's just as telling as anything else.
no subject
"Yeah, I do not like him either."
It's putting it lightly. Noah signed up for it, of course, but he didn't really know what he was signing up for until it was too late. How much time would he have given Attar in the end if he had not found a way out? It makes him sick to think about.
"I... more than know. After two decades, I found a way to be free from him and... I did it." It had its costs and risks. Anything in these realms worth anything, they are not done or given freely. "So now I have returned to Valhalla, trying to make up for all I have done. Freyja wants me here to... keep an eye on me."
He won't be leaving this realm anytime soon.
no subject
"Shut up you did!" she says, giving him a gentle shove. "You're winding me up, you are! There's no way someone could do that. I mean not from him. You're having me on, aren't you? You making fun of me?"
She doesn't really think he seems the sort to, and yet what he's telling her, well that doesn't seem possible.
no subject
He does smirk lightly at the gentle shove because she is unlike anyone else he has ever met, and he really likes that about her.
"I am not. I found the Sea Witch in Byblos. Have you heard of her?"
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"I'm not really supposed to talk to witches," her boss doesn't really like it. It's fair enough, she supposes, they can be ever so messy, after all.
"But I've heard of her. Did some mojo on you, did she?"
no subject
"...it's complicated. I made a deal with her, and I went through a trial."
The trial had a high probability of killing him especially since he had no anchors, but he survived somehow.
"I survived. Now I'm half a demon instead of a whole one."